The journey into self-love and self-acceptance must begin with self-examination… until you take the journey of self-reflection, it is almost impossible to grow or learn in life.

-Iyanla Vanzant-

As we near the end of another year, often our thoughts begin to reflect on both what we’ve left behind and what lies ahead. Many people find themselves questioning whether they reached their yearly targets, made strides toward a goal, or strengthened their relationships. And in the course of reflecting on what has passed, they begin to shape what they want to hope to achieve in the future.

This line of questioning, while sometimes uncomfortable, is a valuable tool any of us can use to increase our capacity for self-reflection and thus improve our lives. When we spend time pondering on where we’ve been, where we are, and where we’d like to go, we are able to see a more accurate picture of our lives and relationships. We can then take that picture and expand it to include the life we want to live. Oprah Winfrey once said, “You cannot have a meaningful life without having self-reflection.” But where do we start? How do we even begin on a journey to self-reflection?

Below you will find 20 questions for you to ask yourself in 2020. These 20 questions give you the opportunity to self-reflect in a way that will help you identify your values, assess your strengths and failures, think about the impact of your past decisions on your life, and imagine where you want to be in the future.

20 questions to ask yourself in 2020:

1. Who am I really?

2. Do I love myself? Why or why not?

3. What matters most in my life?

4. Have I done any good in the world recently?

5. What small act of kindness was I once shown that I will never forget?

6. What worries me most about the future? Is this a reasonable worry?

7. What am I afraid of? Why does it scare me?

8. Am I holding on to something I need to let go of? Why have I not let it go? Is it time to let it go now?

9. When did I last push the boundaries of my comfort zone?

10. Have I done anything lately worth remembering?

11. What do I need to change about myself? Why haven’t I made the change?

12. What is my ideal self?

13. Am I living the life of my dreams? Why or why not?

14. What would I do today if there was no more tomorrow?

15. What are the biggest things I’ve learned in life to date? Where did those lessons come from?

16. What advice would I give to myself three years ago?

17. What advice would the me from one year in the future give to myself now?

18. What opportunities am I looking for in my life? How can I create those opportunities now?

19. Is it more important to love or to be loved?

20. Does it really matter what others think of me?

BONUS QUESTION:

21. When it’s all said and done, will I have said more than I’ve done? Which one matters more, what I said or what I did?

By asking yourself these questions, you can more intentionally process your thoughts and feelings in order to understand why you feel the way you do. Understanding and being in control of your thoughts and feelings is one of the ways you can change your behavior for the better and, as a result, be able to achieve your goals.

While these questions and the answers can be intimidating, you don’t have to do this exercise alone. One of the best ways to be accountable for the answers to those questions is to engage the help of a life coach because a life coach can be a valuable resource and support. They can also be an unbiased sounding board for exploring these questions, and the answers, further and into a shape that will help you reach your goals in 2020.

Find a life coach that will be a great fit for you in 2020 here.

What are some questions you plan to ask yourself in 2020? Let us know in the comments below.